Mango Lime Spinach Green Smoothie // Green Monkee COPYCAT

USING  A  VITAMIX  //  OR  //  BLENTEC  BLENDER

(if you do not have a high watt blender, layer and mix ingredients 1 or 2 at a time)

LAYER IN YOUR BLENDER:

3  and  1/2  cups water

1/4  cup lemon juice

4  cups baby spinach 

1/3-1/2  cup ground flaxseed

4  peeled clementines

1  lime, peeled

2  TABLESPOONS honey

3  cups frozen mango pieces

Makes 3-5 servings depending on how big your servings end up being.  

Drink immediately or store with an airtight container in the fridge.

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Monkee Ballz // COPYCAT of the Green Monkee

PAYTON OLIVIA:  "I love your ballz mom!"

ME:  "Why, thank you!  I love them too."   :0)

COPYCAT and an adequate (NOT PERFECT) Trader Joe's dark chocolate peanut butter cups substitute.

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In a large bowl combine: 

1  and 1/3 cups peanut butter 

-  cook’s choice: crunchy or creamy

5  TABLESPOONS maple syrup

1  teaspoon vanilla 

- Mexican vanilla preferred 

ADD: 

1/2  cup oat flour 

1/2  cup chocolate collagen protein powder 

-  or your choice of chocolate protein powder 

Mix, combine, and then blend together. 

-  If too doughy and sticky: ADD a few tablespoons of both oat flour and chocolate protein powder. 

-  If too dry: ADD more peanut butter, maple syrup and a touch of vanilla. 

Make walnut size balls until all dough is used - usually makes 2 dozen. 

Prep chocolate coating. 

ADD to a small frying pan: 

1  cup dark chocolate chips 

1  TABLESPOON coconut oil

Create a double boiler with a small pot of boiling water under the small frypan with the chocolate and the coconut oil. 

Whisk until melted and smooth, remove from the pot of boiling water.

Roll each one through the chocolate coating to cover. 

-  for me, using two large spoons is the fastest and most effective way to maximize the layer of chocolate.

Place on parchment paper. 

REPEAT  until done.

Naked monkee ballz are great too if you run out of chocolate coating.  

...or you could make a little bit more.

Chill in the fridge until firm and then move into an airtight container if you can make them last more than 24 hours.

Keep in the fridge. 

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…why we need the blog
( to interpret my crazy!
and slowly eek out my edits
as I make new batches )

Nic’s Clementine Cake // AKA: Warlock Currency

When you get to know our family, you’ll find out pretty quickly:

We LOVE to watch movies! 

You may even get some unsolicited advice on what you should be watching next.  Such as right now! 

...if you haven’t seen some of the following movies listed with a food quote, I highly recommend them as cinema homework. 

The best news about them? You can pair it with making something to eat.  

Nacho Libre 
- Juan Pablo:  "Why can't we ever have just like a salad?"

- Nacho: "Be grateful, Juan Pablo, today is especially delicious."

READER:  You can eat or drink your greens.
Chicken Cabbage Salad
Spinach and Toasted Pecan Salad
Ginger Green Smoothie - My Jamba Juice CopyCat
GREEN Smoothie - Berry/Banana

Pride And Prejudice
- Mr. Collins:  “What excellent boiled potatoes.  Many years since I've had such an exemplary vegetable.”

READER:  A favorite version of potato - boiled first, of course.
SMASHED! Potatoes  (pair with scrambled eggs)

Napoleon Dynamite
- Napoleon:  “Tina! You fat lard! Come get some dinner.”

READER:  I do not make casseroles.  Enchiladas are as close as I shall venture.
Enchilada Sauce (Gluten-FREE) and baking instructions

Red
- Frank Moses:  "Feel better now?"
- Marvin:  (deep sigh...) “Yeah! Wanna get pancakes?”

READER:  Pancakes are for breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks, and just because they sound good.
Double Trouble Pancakes - Gluten-FREE
Gluten-Free Light As A Feather Pancake
Mama Jo's Cornmeal Pancakes - Gluten FREE and Original Recipe

The Happiest Millionaire
- the housekeeper Mrs. Worth:  "No, Mr. Biddle's on a chocolate cake diet. He says it's the perfect food, containing 'every essential element.'"

READER:  Come for Easter breakfast.  This shall be served:

Gluten-Free Double Chocolate Cake
Mama Jo's Ultimate Chocolate Frosting

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty and introduction to the Clementine Cake:
- Odessa:  "42 years old!!!"
- Walter:  "Odessa, what are you doing here?"
- Odessa:  "Mom made you your favorite clementine cake!"
READER:  find recipe below.  (...This is why you are here.)Press enter or click to view image in full size

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“To see the world, things dangerous to come, to see behind walls, draw closer, to find each other and to feel. That is the purpose of life.” That was the motto of LIFE magazine in Walter Mitty’s world.

And I shall add to this motto:   and to eat cake.

Auntie Nic has graciously made and shared her lovely Clementine Cake several times this summer; the acquisition of which was inspired directly by the movie: 

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. 

This post is made possible by her awesomeness and her culinary skills, clever brain and my springform pans. 

(Albeit my version of things just a bit... )

She shall have all the credit and words of affirmation.

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NOTE:  ALL Y'ALL! Plan ahead!  You may need to start this the night before or the morning of wanting to eat this cake.  The clementines need to be boiled for 2 hours and then cooled before using. 

CAKE:
5 clementines or tasty//large mandarine oranges
6 eggs, beaten
1 cup sugar
2 and 1/3 cups almond flour
1 and 1/2 teaspoon baking powder

Put washed clementines // large mandarines // in a pot with enough cold water to cover.

Bring to a boil.

Cook at a simmer for 2 hours.

Drain and cool.  I will typically put them on a plate and let them cool there.

When cool, cut each in half and remove seeds.

Using everything (skin, pith, and fruit) make a smooth puree using a Vitamix or Belndtec or food processor. 

In a large mixing bowl combine and mix your sugar, ground almonds and baking powder.

Add the beaten eggs until combined.

Fold in and combine your clementine puree well.

Set aside.

Pre-heat oven to 375.

Prep a springform pan with butter and dust with sugar.
(If you do not have a glass bottom springform pan, line with parchment paper.)

Pour mixture into prepared pan and smooth top to the edges.

Bake for 30 to 50 minutes until golden brown on top, dark brown at edges, and a clean baking skewer check.  This cake can easily over-bake... (ask me how I know!!)  When I make it in my 9 inch springform pan, I find myself checking it right at the 30 minute mark and then every 5 minutes after that until "done" with a clean skewer check.

NOTE:  For the huge bake time differences: your 8 inch springform will bake longer and the 9 inch more quickly.

Remove from the oven and cool on a baking rack IN THE SPRINGFORM PAN until cooled.

Prep frosting.

When cooled (or not... this is super tasty warm too!) frost and serve.

Store in the fridge if any survives.

FROSTING:
2 clementines or tasty//large mandrine oranges, zested
1 of the clementines (ONLY 1!) juiced
1 cube of butter 
3 cups powdered sugar

OPTIONAL:
1/2-1 teaspoon orange flavor 
OR wild orange oil (a few drops)

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the basics: CAST IRON CARE // NEW + USED + SAD

 

PICTURED: 

THE BEST cast iron cleaning tool: 
BAKING  SODA

a LARGE Lodge brand cast iron skillet

a MEDIUM 10" Wagner Ware skillet
It is my first Wagner!!
Goodwill didn't know what they had...
( cue the smirk )

When I travel and look for a souvenir, I love to find antiques that are useful.

Beautiful handkerchiefs.

Handmade apron.

A jar of buttons.

My favorites have always been Wagner Ware cast iron and orphaned quilt blocks.  

Easy finds in Michigan and Arkansas... 

(a hard hunt everywhere else).

My acquisitions for the kitchen have become family favorites and are used daily.  

And camping with cast iron is inevitable with the steady reliability of our biggest cast iron pot: "Big Bertha".

This blog post is meant as a permanent how-to-reference for my family members TO  CLEAN  THE  CAST  IRON  ON  THEIR  OWN. 

No, I'm not yelling at you unless you're the one who skipped the heat and oil steps and now the skillet I wanted to use for making breakfast is rusty...

This is a post for ALL cast iron:

NEW from Target, Kroger, Academy, Costco, Lodge, etc.

USED last night (or last week and hid in the oven).

SAD and rusty from Red/White/and Blue Thrift, Goodwill or Grandma  ...or even a forgotten camping trip you never told your mom about.

The steps for cleaning and care are for everyone.  YAY!

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FOR  CAST  IRON  AT  HOME:  

new  //  used  //  rusty and sad

CLEAN with baking soda and rinse with vinegar if anything has molded or smells rancid - repeat as needed and then the final time just use the baking soda and rinse with water.

DRY  with a cloth rag.

HEAT  over a gas stove range or put in the oven at 350 for 10 minutes.

REMOVE  from heat and oil all over: top // bottom // edges // handles // with cooking oil or olive oil and rag.  (paper towel shreds) 

COOL  before storing.

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CAST  IRON  and  CAMPING:  

find yourself a clean pinecone for a scubber; clean your cast iron and then toss the nasty used pinecone into the fire.

WHEN YOU GET HOME FROM CAMPING 

- BEFORE YOU STORE IN THE BASEMENT OR GARAGE:

CLEAN with baking soda and rinse with vinegar if anything has molded or smells rancid - repeat as needed and then the final time just use the baking soda and rinse with water.

DRY  with a cloth rag.

HEAT  over a gas stove range or put in the oven at 350 for 10 minutes.

REMOVE  from heat and oil all over: top // bottom // edges // handles // with cooking oil or olive oil and rag.  (paper towel shreds) 

COOL  before storing.

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What they charge to do it for you:

Wagner Ware Cast Iron Restoration Page

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the basics: FRENCH TOAST MIX

Throughout all the years of teaching kids how to cook for themselves, I think this might be my most:

1) written down by a pre-teen and learning-how-to-cook recipe

AND

2) texted instructions/recipe to my older-left-the-house-kids 

I know I have said out loud each time: just memorize it!  

So, is this blog post for them because they never did memorize it; or is it for all of you who never got to write it down on a 4X6 card as an 8 year old??  

No matter.

...It will just be here for ALL of you from your Mama Jo.

NOTE:  the amount listed is for about 3-4 people eating.  Half/Double/Triple/Quadruple as needed for the number of eaters you may be cooking for.

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Gather up:

cinnamon
Mexican vanilla

eggs

heavy whipping cream OR whole milk
sliced bread - great news: old is best! 

(and you'll want 2-3 slices of bread per person)

cooking spray or butter

Pre-heat over a medium heat your desired skillet (remember to use cooking spray or butter!)

COMBINE in a large bowl or a shallow dish:

4 eggs 

2 TABLESPOONS of Heavy Whipping Cream or whole milk

1 teaspoon Mexican vanilla

cinnamon sprinkled on the entire above combination 

Mix vigorously with a fork or flat bottomed whisk until the egg whites are no longer clumpy.

Dredge bread slices through your mixture on both sides until there are no dry spots.

Cook both sides until a toasty golden brown, flipping as needed.

Serve hot with any of the following topping ideas:

(OR NONE cuz it is great on its own!)

buttermilk syrup

maple syrup

nutella

powder sugar

jam

fresh fruit

peanut butter

almond butter

apple sauce

mini chocolate chips

toasted pecans

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Click Link FOR: Baking With Natural Yeast: BASIC BREAD

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the basics: SCRAMBLED EGGS

"Seriously... ?? 

A recipe for EGGS?" - you question.

And emphatically I reply - "Absolutely."

HECK  YES.

I've seen it, eaten it, poked it, pretended I ate it... 

You can actually ruin scrambled eggs.

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Into a medium bowl add:

4 - 12  eggs, cracked (minus any shell pieces)

2 - 4 TABLESPOONS heavy whipping cream or whole milk

Kosher salt

coarse black pepper

Whip up throughly with a small whisk or large fork.

Cook up in a medium frying pan greased with butter or olive oil or cooking spray.

Gently stir, fold, in general keep the mixture moving until your desired cooked consistency.  

I prefer an all-the-way-cooked-and-not-wet-looking consistency; while Daddy Bret prefers to question if it has been cooked all the way.  

YOUR EGGS!  You decide my friend!   :0)

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the basics: OATMEAL

All of Payton's childhood trauma might be centered on oatmeal...  adding to the trauma, and much to her dismay, "sugar cereal" was only purchased for Christmas stockings and birthdays.

I tried to get inventive (and sneaky) with cooked oatmeal!

- breakfast smoothies

- granola

- steel-cut oats (different texture)

And always reminded Payton that no matter how sick and tired she was of it - she still had it better than ME who grew up with FOOD STORAGE oatmeal (and no added sweetner), which is historically the saddest oatmeal of them all.

NEVER have sad oatmeal!  (Truly, it is your choice if you do...)

Add some fun and creative toppings, including:

Nutella

maple suryup

fresh fruit 

coconut 

toasted coconut

chia seed

nuts

toasted nuts

Crasins

rasins

cinnamon

pumpkin pie spice

vanilla

protein powder

dark brown sugar

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Steel Cut Oats //  OR  // Old Fashioned Oats

Great for a meal-prep idea as:

breakfast-on-the-go

breakfast smoothie

Gather up:

steel cut oats or old fashioned oats

medium sauce pan

filtered water

pink salt

your favorite wooden spoon

4 cups filtered water

2 cups of your oat choice, evenly measured 

1 teaspoon pink salt

Bring everything to a simmer and turn your heat down to low.

Stir constantly (do not start doing laundry or something else...) for the simmer time.

Steel Cut Oats simmer for 15-20 minutes and you may need to add an extra 1/2-1 cup water.

Old Fashioned Oats simmer for 5-8 minutes.

Turn off the heat.

Serve up and eat immediately, or if it was for a meal prep wait for it to cool and then separate out into portions for fridge storage.

Reminder:  Suggested fun toppings near top of blog post.

Note:  If this is too much of an amount, use 1/2 portions and a small saucepan.

Enjoy!  And maybe make some for Payton.  :0)

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